Your bank balance?
The number of Facebook Friends you have?
Your living conditions?
Your health?
None of these. It’s something that’s completely within our control yet at the same time can be really tricky to change.
It’s how we think.
Mindset is just another word for it.
This explains why two people’s experience of the same circumstances can be so very different. It’s not the circumstances themselves, but the way we think about them that determines our feelings, which in turn affects the actions we choose to take and ultimately the results we get.
Two years ago, I was diagnosed with breast cancer. Of course it was a shock, but it was caught early and was very treatable. I could have had all manner of dark thoughts – but on the way home from the hospital callback appointment James Blunt was on the radio singing “It’s gonna be OK” and that became my mantra. From then on my overriding thoughts were “I am lucky”. I was incredibly lucky to have been called for a mammogram in a local test of under 50s. I was fortunate enough to be covered by private medical insurance and to have incredibly supportive family, friends and employer. The side effects of the chemotherapy were not completely debilitating and I attended (and partied at) two weddings and a diamond wedding anniversary during my treatment.
I really believe mindset is the secret to being happy – but don’t assume my life is a bed of roses – I haven’t worked it all out – yet!
Why is it so difficult to rid our minds of negative thoughts? Our brains are wired to keep thinking familiar thoughts. So if we’ve been telling ourselves the same old story over and over “I can’t run”, “I’m not a confident person”, it’s going to take a bit of work to replace those thoughts with new helpful ones. But ultimately, it is a choice. Worry, fear, shame, disappointment, regret are all just thoughts (albeit powerful ones) that prevent us from taking action.
This is where coaching can help. If you are open to challenge and ready for change, coaching can help you to identify the thought patterns which are not serving you and to find new beliefs which are consistent with the ‘you’ that you want to become. And you have to put in the practice – it doesn’t happen overnight and the brain will quickly revert to old ways of thinking- but awareness is the first step.
What are the thought patterns that you would like to lose?
Contact me for free no-obligation chat to find out more.
